Rambling Writer and Reader

Blue “Don’t do this.” His eyes are big and desperate. Hurt creeps into his voice as he grips my hands. “You can’t.” I don’t even struggle against the tears that runs down my face. “I can and I will. I thought…” I reclaim my hands and bury my face in them for a second. “Oh my god, how could I be so fucking stupid?”  “You’re not! It’s not…” “Just stop it!” I snap, anger blazing hot in the pit of my stomach. “You don't get to apologize, just so you can feel better. You screwed up, Graham. You! No one else. And this isn't going away.” He looks so panicked, my stupid, shattered heart squeezes in sympathy. “Blue, please…” He trails of, probably because he knows me better than anyone in this entire world and he knows that he messed up. Nothing he says could ever make up for the pain he caused. “Blue”, he says again and I have to turn, have to leave, because his eyes are wet and I can't trust my treacherous heart not to break even more.  I've barely taken a step